The Mirror in a Stranger's Hand

Even when looking into a mirror, the face we see is not always our face as it is to others. Our perceptions about our own values, merits, flaws, and character all colour our visions of ourselves. Quite often if others could see us as we see ourselves they wouldn't even recognize the image. Such is definitely the case with me.

I see within myself a great deal of potential, but I generally don't believe that I have lived up to that potential. I look at friends, family, and even strangers in many cases as if they stood above me in some way or other. A sterling example of this is Ryan.

Ryan is one of my best friends. On top of that we worked together on the overnight so long, both of us doing Backup work, that it looked like we were attached at the hip. Ryan often told me that he respected me, but I always felt that he was better than I am. More technically inclined, more confident, and more dynamic than myself. He always disagreed with this, he said that I just felt that way because he was more loud about it than I was.

Today I found out he wasn't the only one with that opinion.

For the past week one of the Backup Supervisors from the dayshift came onto the overnight shift to cover the time when our Supervisor was on vacation. Kris, the backup I'm referring to, has known Ryan and I for a long time. We never actually worked together because his shift usually ended when ours began, but we've definitely interacted in the past.

This week he and I ended up working closely together to keep the overnight shift running smoothly. I've been the Backup Supervisor and Backup Senior Technical Advisor for the overnight shift for a long time, so he had some questions he wanted to ask, and some things I needed to show him to make things work out. Despite my early misgivings about his presence on my shift, we actually made a pretty good team.

At the end of today's shift we had a chance to hang around for awhile and really talk. He told me that he was always somewhat intimidated by Ryan and I because we were so confident in what we were doing. More to the point though, he said something that surprised me a great deal. "I'm more intimidated by you than I am by Ryan, I can read him, I can't read you at all. "

He went on to tell me that he was worried when he was first told that he would have to work as my Supervisor for the week, because he thought I might hold it against him. We talked about how I always thought I stood in Ryan's shadow, and he corrected me on that. Apparently a number of people have noticed me, and it's his firm belief that I could run the entire call centre by myself. Wow…..

When Ryan used to tell me things like that I always believed he was just being nice because we were such good friends. To hear it again, and more strongly worded, from somebody that barely worked with me has given me quite a lot to think about. What amazing differences there are between the images people see in the mirror, and the images other people see.

Every now and then it's gratifying to catch a glimpse of yourself reflected by the mirror in a strangers hand.